details, details

well... i thought that was the end of my piña silk quest. after several more email exchanges with veluz, i realize there's more to just buying the darn cloth. for example, if you're purchasing the piña silk in 60" width, then you should also find an embroiderer who has a bastidor that can accomodate 60 inches of cloth. the hitch here? not all lumban embroiderers own a 60 inch bastidor. great!

and so come june, i will be scouting naman for embroiderers who will accept my cloth requirement so that i can save on my gown expenses. otherwise, i will have to purchase the cloth in 30 or 36 inches width. that obviously spells additional cost.

speaking of expenses, i also have to decide whether we have our gown and barong machine embroidered or to have it by hand. as expected, machine embroidery would cost less than by hand (around 30 to 40 percent less, according to veluz). but hand embroidery is definitely nicer. as veluz puts it, it is more "maumbok tsaka parang raw ang mga gilid ng design." now this presents another dilemma. i have yet to see an actual sample of this mas maumbok style so that i can appreciate it more and decide if it's worth paying extra for.

being a real bobo at cloths, this has proved to be quite a good learning experience for me. thanks to veluz who's been so patient in answering all my queries. definitely no regrets in getting her.

********************
on to other wedding preps... another dilemma is our florist. initially we were relying on joseph's friend to help us out with the bouquets and other floral arrangements. but recently, she informed us that she might not be here to attend our wedding as they have plans of going to the states for the holidays. so, that got us to thinking that she might not be able to deliver us the flowers at all. that's a bit disappointing. but it's good though that she has informed us ahead of time of her plans so that we can take other measures.

i suggested to joseph that we start looking around na for other suppliers. he said that his brother's girlfriend can probably help us with that because she has several contacts when she used to work for the government some months ago. i, on the other hand, have turned to w@w again, in the hopes that i can get some good feedback on potential suppliers. one of them is Petal Patch. i plan to contact them one of these days, just to inquire about their services and rates. thank God for w@w.

here are a few feedback on Petal Patch from fellow w@wies:

Met with AJ (of Petal Patch) yesterday and am so glad that I've signed with her. Another plus is that she gets their roses from Island Rose! Yahoo :) Told her about the apricot roses and she said she will make a note of it but that she knows that between now and then, there will probably be a million changes to the floral arrangements. Already, from the initial idea of candles and flowers we've talked about incorporating fruit but that might still change... am just glad she's flexible and open to ideas! ~ Mik

@@@
super accommodating na si Elaine sa lahat ng queries and very friendly. she will be honest enough to tell kung kaya niya or not to work with your budget. ~ Con

@@@
I was very happy with Petal Patch. My package included the bouquets for the entourage members and the church flowers. I loved the pictures of their work - ang linis ng pagkakagawa. And true enough, ang ganda ng flowers! I loved my bouquet!!! And I love the flowers along the Church aisles. There were two kinds: blue hydrangeas in pails, and pink gerberas surrounded by white roses in pails.

One thing though, our contract was not followed to the last detail. From what I remember, the package includes two small baskets of flowers for the offertory, and I think there was only 1 (based on the video of Jason - I had 2 friends for this and one of them offered a pail with flowers). Also, there was supposed to be a bouquet for the bouquet-toss but I didn't see one. But really, I didn't mind na because I was very happy with everything else. ~ Charo

********************
amidst all the information research, i stumbled into this beautiful quote from Henry James, lifted from The Wings of the Dove (1902). very, very appropriate!

They had exchanged vows and tokens,
sealed their rich compact, solemnised,
so far as breathed words, murmured sounds and lighted eyes
and clasped hands could do it,
their agreement to belong only,
and to belong tremendously, to each other.

*sigh*

update on piña silk

after numerous emails and responses, it seems like i will be sourcing our piña silk from La Herminia. veluz initially advised me to ask their price for 60 inches width for piña silk since i will be able to save more if i got it at 60". she tipped me that her supplier sold it for Php 700 per yard of 60" width.

so yesterday, i emailed arlyne of la herminia and she told me that they sold it at PhP 700 per yard too. great! since there is no difference in price, i am now more inclined to get from la herminia since their manila office is in muntinlupa lang. quite near to our place. veluz's supplier, judging from his landline number, seemed to have his shop in the divisoria area or somewhere thereabouts. too far away from me.

and with that, i told arlyne that i may be ordering in july pa since i still haven't had my measurements taken yet.

********************
speaking of veluz, she wanted to change our working schedule, making it earlier than the one she originally planned. so, instead of having my measurement taken in july 24, she has moved it to june 26. a month earlier, if you notice. that is because she wants us to have ample time for changes, repairs, delays and what-have-you's, just in case the embroiderers won't be able to deliver on time. made perfect sense to me.

here's the new schedule veluz has drawn up for me:
26 June PM - Measurement Taking
10 July - 1st Fitting (muslin)
24 July - 2nd Fitting (shantung)
07 August - 3rd Fitting (shantung)
15 Aug–15 Oct - Period allotted for embroidery
30 October - Final Fitting (piña)
04 December - Delivery/Pick-up
22 December - Wedding Day

based on this new schedule, i will have my final fitting as early as october of this year. this means that i'd have to watch my diet and figure so i can maintain it for two months so that i'd still be able to fit into my gown for the wedding in december. two months!!! gym time!!! hehehehehe!!!!

contemplating on The Bellevue, Manila

yes, i think we'll be holding the pre-wedding preparations at the Bellevue, Manila. it's still within Filinvest Corporate City, but it's located at the North Bridgeway, Northgate Cyberzone in Alabang. not really too far away from St James and the Palms. we are really considering it seriously because we might get a discount on the rooms since mom is a member.

here are a few feedback from some w@wies on the hotel:

I had my preparations at The Bellevue and I do recommend the hotel. I chose it because I was always properly assisted every time I go to the hotel. Their rooms are well decorated & nicely furnished. Most importantly, their bathrooms are up to my standards. Vivere is nice, and I honestly like their lobby (which is great for pictures) but it has less of the 'hotel feel'. My only complaint at The Bellevue was the food (breakfast buffet in particular)-- definitely needs a lot of improvement.

If you decide to book a room at The Bellevue, I suggest you take the 2-bedroom suite since the living and dining room area is larger. You don't have to worry about fitting dozens of your crew in there. :) ~ Kelly


I got three rooms from Bellevue for our wedding preparations. Thumbs up ako sa kanila. Nasulit ko yung paggamit ng membership card. Sa service and food, approve din. Siguro yung suites nila, mas maganda for the bridal preps, medyo sikip yung de luxe rooms. ~ Ryanne

more pictures of the Bellevue here.

on piña cloth

recently i have been trying to scout around for cheap suppliers of piña and piña silk cloths for my gown and the men's barongs for the wedding in december. i was initially depending on my brother, Rex, since he was nearer to iloilo and aklan and he could ask around for their prices. by the way, piña and other natural woven cloths come from and are manufactured in and come from, not from Lumban, Laguna. Lumban is where all the hand and machine embroideries hail from.

anyways, it has been the longest time and my brother still hasn't informed us of any possible suppliers. fortunately, the other night ago, i ran into an ad posted at Kasal Dot Com of a supplier who manufactured these cloths. La Herminia Piña Weaving Industry is a manufacturer/trader of hand woven piña cloth,piña-silk, abaca-cotton-silk, piña bastos-abaca-cotton and fine abaca cloth. so, without hesitancy, i immediately emailed them through their website.

their response was quite prompt. i received their reply the day after. Arlyne Tumbokon, their marketing manager, was the one answering all my queries. anyway, i found out that they sold pure piña cloth (30" width) for PhP 600/yard and piña silk cloth for PhP 280-300/yard (30" width) and Php 400/yard (36" width).

we found it quite reasonable since Veluz estimated piña to be sold at PhP 700/yard. a hundred bucks cheaper!!! they have an office here in manila, specifically in muntinlupa so that means we don't have to spend anymore for courier fees for us to get the cloths direct from their plant in Aklan.

i forwarded their email to me to Veluz so i can get her opinion on this. haven't heard from her yet though. we've also inquired from La Herminia the cost of their embroidered cloths as well, for the barongs.

i found out that there are two other big manufacturers of piña cloth in Aklan -- Heritage Arts and Crafts and Dela Cruz House of Piña. will contact them as well just to compare prices. i'm not sure though if they have an office in manila too like La Herminia does.

********************
incidentally, my brother finally texted to me last night the telephone numbers of two suppliers in iloilo. again, just to canvass their prices, i called them up this afternoon.

it turns out that they only sell cut cloths with embroidery already so they sell them on a piece-rate basis. the first supplier i called told me that they got their cloths from manila pa! hahaha! they sold them at PhP 6000/piece. the second one sold them at around the same range, around PhP 5500 to 6000/piece. the old lady was quite rude ha. i was just asking my usual questions like how much it costed, if they sold pure piña lang with no embroidery and where they got their cloths from. she kept on saying "sus!" and didn't even say "Goodbye" when i bid farewell and even thanked her for answering my questions. the nerve! just to get even, i called her back and hung up on her too as soon as she said hello. hehehehe!!! sweet revenge! serves her right! i was so pissed eh. :-P

so i guess it's going to be La Herminia na. i just need to hear from Veluz and to compare their prices with the other two manufacturers.

the da vinci code

still on books... i am now reading The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown. i wasn't supposed to buy it but with all the controversies surrounding it, i finally gave in. i was curious, in other words. the fact that it was on sale too was a bonus na lang for me.

i can't wait to see the movie in may of 2006. so far, stellar cast includes Tom Hanks, Jean Reno, Audrey Tautou, Ian McKellen, and Alfred Molina. it will be directed by Ron Howard of Splash, Apollo 13 and A Beautiful Mind fame.

a little bit of trivia:

France's Culture Ministry has granted permission for the film crew to film inside the Louvre.

'Russell Crowe' was considered for the role of Robert Langdon.

********************

here is newsweek's attempt to separate fact from fiction:

Did Leonardo include Mary Magdalene in his “Last Supper”?
Most art scholars say no. The figure reputed to be Mary Magdalene is actually the beloved disciple John, who is usually depicted young and clean-shaven.

Were Jesus and Mary M. married?
Although there is no way to prove or disprove this, most experts consider it highly unlikely. Their main argument: there is no mention of it in canonical writings.

Was Mary M. a prostitute?
This misperception probably began with a sermon by Pope Gregory the Great in A.D. 591 in which he conflated several figures into one. In 1969 the Vatican officially overruled Gregory.

Are Opus Dei and the Priory of Sion real organizations?
Yes, but there is no indication that either is involved in any plot to conceal or reveal secrets of the Holy Grail.

What is the Holy Grail?
The most widely accepted idea is that it was the cup used by Christ at the Last Supper. Others have hypothesized that it was a secret book. In the 12th century a French abbot claimed to possess it; his silver chalice now resides in the National Gallery of Art in Washington, D.C.

Did male leaders cover up the true role of women in the early church?
Yes, in the sense that history is written by the winners, and in a patriarchal society, men had a big edge.

What happened to Mary M. after the Resurrection?
Nobody knows. In the Eastern Orthodox tradition, she went to Turkey. A Western legend says she went to Provence.

Is there a secret cache of documents that reveal the true history of Christianity?
No one knows, but scholars are busy analyzing ancient documents found in Egypt in the last century. These texts, known as the Gnostic Gospels, were lost for centuries, and could shed new light on the origins of the church.

Did Leonardo hide clues about church secrets in his paintings?
Art historians doubt it.


Who's that mystery person?

© 2005 Newsweek, Inc.

********************

everybody seems to be riding on The Da Vinci Code's popularity these days. so many books have sprouted, claiming to "decode" Da Vinci's code. then there's this hotel promo, offering the Da Vinci Code Special! get this:

Concorde's Hotel du Louvre, located right next to the museum, is offering a special "Da Vinci Code" package, including a junior suite with a view into the Louvre, breakfast each morning, two Louvre Museum Passes and a special Da Vinci Code map for $545 US per night. This offer is good through the end of next year, December 31, 2005 and requires a two-night stay.

ain't that a grand idea for a Da Vinci Code honeymoon? hahahaha!!!

the five people you meet in heaven

yup, i was finally able to get down and read this one in 3 days. it was hard to put down because it had a rather interesting take on the idea of heaven. the book was very light yet thought-provoking. although it is a work of fiction, it still manages to make you think what your heaven will be, as it is different for each person.

i loved so many lines in this book. here are just some of them:

People think of heaven as a paradise garden, a place where they can float on clouds and laze in rivers and mountains. But scenery without solace is meaningless.

There are no random acts. We are all connected. You can no more separate one life from another than you can separate a breeze from the wind... Death doesn't just take someone, it misses someone else, and in the small distance between being taken and being missed, lives are changed.

Sacrifice is a part of life. It's supposed to be. It's not something to regret. It's something to aspire to... Sometimes when you sacrifice something precious, you're not really losing it. You're just passing it on to someone else.

Parents rarely let go of their children, so children let go of them. They move on. They move away. The moments that used to define them -- a mother's approval, a father's nod -- are covered by moments of their own accomplishments. It is not until much later, as the skin sags and the heart weakens, that children understand; their stories, and all their accomplishments, sit atop the stories of their mothers and fathers, stones upon stones, beneath the waters of their lives.

Holding anger is poison. It eats you from the inside. We think that hating is a weapon that attacks the person who harmed us. But hatred is a curved blade. And the harm we do, we do to ourselves.

Love, like rain, can nourish from above, drenching couples with a soaking joy. But sometimes, under the angry heat of life, love dries on the surface and must nourish from below, tending to its roots, keeping itself alive.

Lost love is still love. It takes a different form, that's all. You can't see their smile or bring them food or tousle their hair or move them around a dance floor. But when those senses weaken, another heightens. Memory. Memory becomes your partner. You nurture it. You hold it. You dance with it... Life has to end. Love doesn't.

lovely noh? and with that i am sure, joseph won't be able to keep himself from buying the book. i was telling him kasi to just borrow my copy since books are very costly in oz. imagine, AUD$ 22 (equivalent to around Php 900+) when i bought the book at a sale for only Php 220+.

by the way, what's also quite interesting was that the Philippines was mentioned several times in the book. even one character was Filipino, expressing a few words in tagalog (ina, bakya, sundalo to name a few).

revised and updated wedding checklist

as per jody liwanag's request, i am updating our wedding checklist on our blog. jody, by the way, is part of events experts, our on-the-day coordinators.

12 months before (december 2004)
Plan the Pamamanhikan and announce the engagement.
Choose a wedding date and time.
Draw up a budget with your fiancé. Consult your parents if necessary.
Determine the number of guests you are able to invite.
Look for ceremony and reception sites.
Reserve chosen ceremony and reception sites.
Compile your guest list from the list you and your fiancé will make. (still ongoing)
Notify out-of-town guests so they can make early confirmation of attendance.
Decide on your new home after the wedding. (still ongoing)

11 months before (january 2005)
Select your ceremony officiant and check his availability. (still clueless)
Select primary sponsors Check their availability and personally invite them.
Choose members of the wedding entourage. Check their availability and personally invite them.

10 months before (february 2005)
Decide on the color scheme (wine red, forest green and matte gold) and wedding theme.
Finalize your guest list. (still ongoing)
Consult a Travel Agent regarding Honeymoon Plans especially if you will be traveling to countries that require entry visas. (still clueless)

9 months before (march 2005)
Start and canvass for caterers, if necessary.
Secure birth certificates from NSO.

8 months before (april 2005)
Select the style of your wedding gown and your entourage’s attire.
Ask your mother and your fiance’s mother to choose their attire.
Canvass and select a reliable couturier and/or dressmaker.
Schedule measurements and fittings for your bridal gown as well as entourage’s attire.
Schedule your trial make-ups. (with clamar and anne castano)
Schedule Pre-nup pictorials with Mimi Abesamis.

7 months before (may 2005)
Canvass and select a reliable florist.
Canvass and select a reliable photographer/videographer.
Canvass and select musicians.
Submit final draft/mock invites to printer.

6 months before (june 2005)
Select and order wedding souvenirs, and decide on packaging so you can order this as well. Ensure timely delivery of it. (still deliberating on this)
Shop for wedding rings.
Canvass and select gifts for the Principal Sponsors, Entourage and even parents if desired.
Start printing of invites.
Book a hotel room for your wedding day.

5 months before (july 2005)
Finalize the members of the wedding entourage. (still ongoing, we need one more little boy.)
Select the mass readers and program hosts. Check their availability.
Double check full names (including middle initials) of your wedding sponsors, members of the entourage, mass readers and program hosts. (ongoing)
Canvass and select wedding stationery printers and calligrapher.
Start making draft for the missalettes. (ongoing)
Canvass and select make-up artist/hairdresser.
Canvass and select cake maker.
Canvass and book other wedding service providers (i.e. decors, butterflies, candles, etc.).
Obtain a sample copy of a sample missalette from your officiant.
Draft your ceremony program.
Begin planning out your honeymoon. (still clueless)
Start working on your vows, if you are saying your own.
Secure Certificate of No Impediment from the Australian Embassy and statutory declarations for spouse visa application.
Secure original or certified true copies of your and your fiance’s baptismal, confirmation and residence certificates.
Obtain marriage license from your city/municipal hall. Be sure to have all needed documents.
Measurement taking with Veluz.
Groom: Secure certificate of freedom to marry from your parish in Canberra.
Bride: Secure CENOMAR from NSO, to be submitted to Australian Embassy, as part of spouse visa application.

4 months before (august 2005)
Decide on and finalize wedding details/contracts/agreements with your florist, musicians, photographer, caterer, couturier, make-up artist, and other suppliers of your choice.
Have missalette draft approved by your officiating priest and the church or ceremony venue.
Complete honeymoon plans and book your itinerary.
First fitting with Veluz. Pay second installment (25%).
Book a calligrapher or a social printer for addressing of invitations. If invitations and guest list are ready, go ahead with the calligraphy/printing.
Reserve the Church for a wedding rehearsal.
Confirm fitting schedules with your couturier and provide those concerned with a copy of these dates.
Trial HMUs with Clamar and Anne Castano.
Prenup pictorials with Mimi.
Attend pre-cana seminar (20th of August).
Finalize on the menu with Anne of The Palms.
Order the bridal accessories and paraphernalia.
Shop for a new home.
Second fitting with Veluz.
Get a complete medical check-up.
Work part-time na lang.
Civil wedding (26th of August).
Personally deliver invitations to your primary sponsors.

3 months before (september 2005)
Set an appointment with your wedding officiant for pre-marital counseling.
Submit marriage contract to officiant or his assistant. Be sure to give all needed documents.
Have missalettes printed. This should give you ample time for corrections.
Shop for your undergarments.
Order and finalize design for wedding cake.
Complete gifts for the sponsors, entourage (if needed).
Finalize décor details with the florist, if needed arrange for a mock set-up.
Re-confirm with the musicians and choose songs for the ceremony and the reception.
Start working on your reception program.
Invite participants for your reception program and check their availability like a friend who will sing.
Pay the Palms (50%).
Third fitting (shantung) with Veluz.
Prepare your AVP if desired.
Organize your calendar to accommodate all pre-wedding affairs (shower parties, etc).
Finalize your arrangement with your make-up artist/hairdresser of your choice.
Arrange for purchase of liquor or bar requirements with the reception venue.
Have passport and other IDs amended. Then, apply for a spouse visa.
Start decorating your new home.

2 months before (october 2005)
Address and send out invitations to guests.
Request respective parishes to have your wedding announced for three weeks. Obtain a wedding ban certificate.
Finalize your ceremony plans and reception program.
Canvass and book for a bridal car service (if it is not provided by the venue). Arrange for your florist to decorate the bridal car.
Make other necessary transportation arrangements to and from the ceremony and reception sites.
Have wedding rings engraved.
Double check favors, accessories and paraphernalia.
Designate at least two people to handle RSVP and prepare a list for monitoring acceptances.
Pay photographer 50%.
Start moving things to your new home.

1 month before (november 2005)
Confirm attendance of guests, make follow-up calls to those who do not respond to R.S.V.P. Give the final count of guests to your caterer/hotel/restaurant.
Have the final meeting with the caterer/hotel/restaurant to confirm details of decors, arrangements, lay-out, etc.
Final fitting (piña) with Veluz. Pay 25%.
Arrange for final fitting for your entourage. Set delivery time.
Pick up missalettes.
Finalize all food and beverage arrangements.
Delegate duties and responsibilities to the participants/entourage involved.
Set final dates for wedding gown delivery, and call times for florists, photographers, and other deliveries/services on your wedding day.
Finalize instructions for your photographer/videographer.
Discuss reception program with your emcee.
Inform parents, sponsors, friends who will give speeches and toast.
Attend wedding rehearsals, bridal showers and bachelor’s party.

2 weeks before (08 december 2005)
Delivery/pick-up bridal gown. Pay last 25%.
Pay The Palms and String Minstrels in full.
Attend wedding rehearsals and last minute showers.
Confirm honeymoon arrangements and transportation arrangement.
Pack for your honeymoon and migration to Australia.
Confirm check-in time and date in the hotel for prepration.
Go to the dentist.
Brides: Practice walking in your shoes.
Confirm final payments to your wedding suppliers.
Start to sleep early and do away with smoking environments.

1 week before (15 december 2005)
Organize accessories/paraphernalia according to category.
Make a phone call to your entourage re: call time to the church or preparation area and inform them of specific tasks assigned to them.
Make a phone call to your mass readers, offerors, emcee, ushers re: call time and inform them of specific tasks assigned to them.
Assign an authorized person to receive all turn-over items of the coordinator.
Rehearse your speeches.
Remind parents, sponsors, and friends who will give speeches to prepare already.
Head to the Spa! Get a massage, scrub, Javanese bath. The works!
Go to confession.
Spend quality time with your family especially with your parents.

1 day before (21 december 2005)
Get your final manicure and pedicure.
Pack for the things that you have to bring in the hotel or preparation venue.

the big day (22 december 2005)
Relax.
Give yourself enough time for hair and make-up.
Remember to wear a robe or button-down shirt so you don’t ruin your hair-do and make-up when you undress.
Savour and enjoy special moment of your big day.
Take pleasure in being the most beautiful bride ever.
Pay videographer 60%.

well, nothing much has changed. i guess more changes are expected in the next two months. until then, i'll keep this list updated from time to time (maybe on a monthly basis).

it's raining!

i love it when it rains. that is IF i'm at home. :-)

this kind of weather just puts me on "lazy" mode. the cool breeze, the sweet smell of the earth and the rumbling of the skies can lull me to dreamland in minutes, especially if it's partnered with a good book and clean comfy sheets. ahhh... heaven! this is the life! the only thing missing is joseph's warm hug. that would really top it all off. *sigh* napamuni-muni tuloy ako...

this ends the heat wave, i suppose. thank god, we don't have to put up with the heat anymore.

bloginality

since wedding preps are temporarily at a standstill, you may have noticed that all recent posts are non-wedding related. here's more...

i got this from theresa, another w@wie. this is my bloginality:

i am an INFJ (Introverted, iNtuitive, Feeling and Judging).

As a weblogger, you are a perfectionist. Even though you have artistic thoughts, you may change designs frequently because of this perfectionistic insticts. You appreciate order and systems, and so you may stay with the same weblog program for a long time to keep things constant. Your personality type is rare, and so you are very special! (naks!)

get your bloginality here.

definition of terms

i was browsing through john the savage's blog tonight and stumbled upon this rather interesting site which gives a whole new meaning to your everyday word. take for instance the definitions of the following words:

longing : having a lack of appreciation for one’s current environment, however shitty.

Microsoft : a compound Greek-English term meaning tiny and flaccid.

letter : archaic, the pre-computer-age habit of writing upon pulped wood with a hand operated stylus and ink; and the subsequent analog transmission of the data contained therein via human and mechanical agency.

AWOL : in the military, a sudden rush of sanity and wisdom; an awakening.

eschew : Gesundheit.

amusing noh? it's called the devil's dictionary. more naughty/nasty stuff can be found on their site. i'd rather not quote them here though, lest i offend the other readers. but for the curious ones, you just might want to take a peek and visit TDD.

********************

i forgot to post my update on joseph's condition. it turns out that the BP reading he got from the gym was unreliable because when he went to his GP last friday, his BP was back to its regular rate. his GP wasn't concerned at all.

joseph's been quite disciplined in what he eats and does these days, after that unnerving incident. it's quite good because he's more conscious now in eating the right kinds and amounts of food, plus, he visits the gym at least three times a week. idol!!! ;-) well, it all remains to be seen really. i hope he can maintain this lifestyle for a long time... AND sana mahawa rin ako sa kanya. hehe! :-P

the best kind of love

i got this beautiful entry from glo, a fellow w@wie. just want to share it with everyone else.

The Best Kind of Love
by Annette Paxman Bowen

I have a friend who is falling in love. She honestly claims the sky is bluer. Mozart moves her to tears. She has lost 15 pounds and looks like a cover girl. "I am young again!" she shouts exuberantly.

As my friend raves on about her new love, I've taken a good look at my old one. My husband of almost 20 years, Scott, has gained 15 pounds. Once a marathon runner, he now runs only down hospital halls. His hairline is receding and his body shows signs of long working hours and too many candy bars. Yet he can still give me a certain look across a restaurant table and I want to ask for the check and head home.

When my friend asked me "What will make this love last?" I ran through all the obvious reasons: commitment, shared interests, unselfishness, physical attraction, and communication.

Yet there's more. We still have fun. Spontaneous good times. Yesterday, after slipping the rubber band off the rolled newspaper, Scott flipped it playfully at me: this led to an all-out war. Last Saturday at the grocery, we split the list and raced each other to see who could make it to the checkout first. Even washing dishes can be a blast. We enjoy simply being together.

And there are surprises.

One time I came home to find a note on the front door that led me to another note, then another, until I reached the walk-in closet. I opened the door to find Scott holding a "pot of gold" (my cooking kettle) and the "treasure" of a gift package. Sometimes I leave him notes on the mirror and little presents under his pillow.

There is understanding.

I understand why he must play basketball with the guys. And he understands why, once a year, I must get away from the house, the kids - and even him - to meet my sisters for a few days of nonstop talking and laughing.

There is sharing.

Not only do we share household worries and parental burdens - we also share ideas. Scott came home from a convention last month and presented me with a thick historical novel. Though he prefers thrillers and science fiction, he had read the novel on the plane. He touched my heart when he explained it was because he wanted to be able to exchange ideas about the book after I'd read it.

There is forgiveness.

When I'm embarrassingly loud and crazy at parties, Scott forgives me. When he confessed losing some of our savings in the stock market, I gave him a hug and said, "It's okay. It's only money."

There is sensitivity.

Last week, he walked through the door with that look that tells me it's been a tough day. After he spent some time with the kids, I asked him what happened. He told me about a 60-year old woman that had a stroke. He wept as he recalled the woman's husband standing beside her bed, caressing her hand. How was he going to tell this husband of 40 years that his wife would probably never recover? I shed a few tears myself. Because of the medical crisis. Because there were still people who have been married 40 years. Because my husband is still moved and concerned after years of hospital rooms and dying patients.

There is faith.

Last Tuesday a friend came over and confessed her fear that her husband is losing his courageous battle with cancer. On Wednesday I went to lunch with a friend who is struggling to reshape her life after divorce. On Thursday a neighbor called to talk about the frightening effects of Alzheimer's disease on her father-in-law's personality. On Friday a childhood friend called long-distance to tell me her father had died. I hung up the phone and thought, This is too much heartache for one week.

Through my tears, as I went out to run some errands, I noticed the boisterous orange blossoms of the gladiolus outside my window. I heard the delighted laughter of my son and his friend as they played. I caught sight of a wedding party emerging from a neighbor's house. The bride, dressed in satin and lace, tossed her bouquet to her cheering friends. That night, I told my husband about these events. We helped each other acknowledge the cycles of life and that the joys counter the sorrows. It was enough to keep us going.

Finally, there is knowing.

I know Scott will throw his laundry just shy of the hamper every night; he'll be late to most appointments and eat the last chocolate in the box. He knows that I sleep with a pillow over my head. I guess our love lasts because it is comfortable. No, the sky is not bluer:it's just a familiar hue. We don't feel particularly young: we've experienced too much that has contributed to our growth and wisdom, taking its toll on our bodies, and created our memories. I hope we've got what it takes to make our love last. As a bride, I had Scott's wedding band engraved with Robert Browning's line "Grow old along with me!" We're following those instructions.

"If anything is real, the heart will make it plain."

There are some people who meet that somebody that they can never stop loving, no matter how hard they try. I wouldn't expect you to understand that, or even believe it, but trust me, there are some love that don't go away. And maybe that makes them crazy, but we should all be blessed to end up with that somebody who has a little of that insanity. Somebody who never lets go. Somebody who cherishes you forever.

art lessons

yesterday, i accompanied my mother to waltermart makati (again!) to attend basic summer art classes* taught by tita peggy's good friend, tito bim. he's the guy who copied the fairies onto the walls of my tita peggy's store (see related post on this). my mom also invited her cousin to join her in the classes. the heat has been becoming quite intolerable during the day and it was a good way to spend one's afternoon in the cool comforts of a mall.

i was initially contented on observing them try their hand on drawing still life using craypas and pencil. i was also listening to tito bim discuss on certain theories and lessons in basic drawing. it was like this for two hours or so. when the class dismissed and i felt that nobody else was looking, i went ahead and tried the exercises myself and eventually found myself drawing an apple using craypas. well.. it isn't much really but i like the feeling of accomplishing something such as this.

i never really took the time to "harness" my artistic talent, if any! i have always been the writing type. but then again, art is such a subjective means of expressing oneself, so it doesn't really matter what other people say about your work. the important thing, i believe, is the feeling of accomplishment and the catharsis that you get once you complete your art piece, whether it be in writing or in colors.

* art lessons are scheduled every saturday @ two in the afternoon at the activity area of the fifth floor of waltermart pasong tamo, makati.

funny tag

saw this picture while i was blog-hopping. i guess by writing it in French, they were able to get away with it. :-P

swiped from here.

tribute to men

Why Men Have it Easier...

Your last name stays put. The garage is all yours. Wedding plans take care of themselves. Chocolate is just another snack. You can be President. You can never be pregnant. You can wear a white T-shirt to a water park. Further, you can wear NO shirt to a water park.

Car mechanics tell you the truth. The world is your urinal. You never have to drive to another gas station restroom because this one is just too icky. You don't have to stop and think of which way to turn a nut on a bolt. Same work, more pay. Wrinkles add character. Wedding dress $5000. Tux rental-$100.

People never stare at your chest when you're talking to them. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet. One mood all the time. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. You know stuff about tanks. A five-day vacation requires only one suitcase. You can open all your own jars.

You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. If someone forgets to invite you, he or she can still be your friend. Your underwear is $8.95 for a three-pack. Three pairs of shoes are more than enough. You almost never have strap problems in public. You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes.

Everything on your face stays its original color. The same hairstyle lasts for years, maybe decades. You only have to shave your face and neck. You can play with toys all your life. Your belly usually hides your big hips. One wallet and one pair of shoes one color for all seasons. You can wear shorts no matter how your legs look.

You can "do" your nails with a pocket knife. You have freedom of choice concerning growing a mustache. You can do Christmas shopping for 25 relatives on December 24 in 25 minutes.

swiped from ITchick :-)

post secret

got this link from aggie, a fellow w@wie.

people from all over sent postcards where they wrote their darkest and probably deepest secrets. made me think what mine was...

how about you? what's YOUR secret?

updates

well, we have finally completed our entourage for the church wedding in december. i'll say that again, if you don't mind... FINALLY! :-)

not having a complete entourage list was getting to be a hindrance to our other wedding preps, especially in the invitations! i'm glad that's settled already. i'm just waiting for joseph to submit to me the complete names (including middle initials) of the people from his side so that i can consolidate it with mine and FINALLY (once again, hehe!) print out the mock-up invites. after which, i will show them to our printer so she can copy it exactly the way we want it.

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my sisters (who are twins, by the way) will be flying out to cebu tomorrow for a vacation. they'll be there to visit our maternal grandparents in bogo.

i hope they will be successful in convincing our lola to practice walking. she had her hip replaced because she broke it one morning when she slipped in the bathroom. she's been really stubborn about walking and we're worried. we're leaving it up to the twins to do something about it. maybe they can talk her into it since they are her favorite apo's.

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my sweetie isn't feeling well these days. too much stress at the office must have caused him to be hypertensive lately. it was only discovered while he was being assessed prior to his gym program. he is attempting kasi to lose weight and be fit for the wedding. ;-)

i hope it isn't anything serious. he'll be seeing his doctor this friday. i'll keep you guys posted.

on marriage FAQs and faeries

joseph referred me to this site: http://www.gov.ph/faqs/marriage.asp this morning. i was saying.. "cool! very informative!" then i found out that one of the government's sources for this article was weddings at work. haha! nahuli na naman gobyerno natin. oh well... what's new?

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my family attended the grand opening of my tita Peggy's FAERIES shop at waltermart pasong tamo. tita Peggy is my mom's long time friend from college. as part of the fairy theme, she asked a good friend of hers who's a fine arts professor at the UP to copy an illustration from her fairy book onto the walls of her store. this was made possible also with the help of other fine arts students, including my brother David. beautiful work really. see picture below of one of the murals.



FAERIES sell cosmetics, toiletries and other fairy what-have-yous. it's on the fifth floor of waltermart makati, corner pasay road and pasong tamo streets.